Adventurous April

(reminder….brackets = digression)

Ergh….was I asleep for most of April and the first two weeks of May?! Anyone else feel like that? … April passed in a haze and the first two weeks of May….well I think that’s a case of I shut my eyes for a minute and there it is… A big fat yellow, sarcastically smiling thirteen·five·fifteen

What you may ask did I do with my time in April. Well my cyber friends and friends who make time to read my monthly babblings, I ask myself the same question. I guess there was the transgression from renter to home owner mid-month. The first abroad-hen experience of my life and the first hen party where I helped organise it. An appointment with my neurologist who referred me to a world specialist of rare cases of epilepsy — yes, I did feel very honoured whilst at the same time feeling like I may be a potential guinea pig. Apparently my epilepsy isn’t related in any way to my deafness. Worth confirming???

There was Easter, which I had to actually refer to my diary to remember what I did. Faced with a blank diary page (which is very unusual) I had to ask my fiancé to remind me. Initially my query was met with similar perplexed confusion (…. — wedding ‘stress’? House stress? Life stress? Who knows anymore). We then worked out we were driving around the country visiting parents and fulfilling various family commitments when all we needed to do at that time was wedmin or housemin or pack for the move that ensued 10 days after.

Which reminds me, our moving day was quite a debacle. I woke up feeling proud of myself for being so organised …..

  • Up early to load the car and be on our way so as not to be late for work — check
  • 2. Front door on latch — check

    3. Heavy boxes accessible first to aid efficient loading — check

    4. Suitable production-line so car or flat was never left unoccupied for any opportunist burglars (yes, years of living in Manchester and being burgled 3 times exhibits itself in the form of a {potentially} unreasonable paranoid maniac) — check

    5. Atleast one of us in possession of a front door key incase latch accidentally releases itself and we become locked out — ergh….#epicfail

    So with no keys no phone no cash no technology whatsoever we were challenged with the task of finding help by ‘old-fashioned means’. No money to make a phone call and no memory to remember anyone’s number, off my fiancé went to the local supermarket whilst I stayed with our belongings to deter ‘opportunists’. He returned with a worker from the supermarket carrying a humungous ladder. Mission break-in commenced.

    It soon became obvious that a ladder and climbing a steep roof to access the flat through an open window was not an option. The only consequence of that would have been a fiancé with broken legs or worse. (Later he confided in me that he had a life reflective moment where he valued his future more than his superpower aspirations. A sign he is ‘ready’ in my mind). After admitting to ourselves that any future career in burglary was evidently obsolete, my fiancé returned to the local supermarket to call a locksmith — we had no choice.

    Frustrated and determined, I re-tried the painful task of sticking my arm through the mailbox, brush in hand as an extension of my arm to try and nudge the latch. A concept I learnt about whilst living in Salford when, in an attempt to raise awareness, the police informed us how burglars enter properties. After a painful struggle, de-robing of clothes due to sweat build up in the effort, a swollen and predictably bruised arm later, I eventually broke in. The potential of a future career as a burglar resurrected. Racing back to the supermarket on my bike, hair flying in my own slipstream, legs pedaling at the speed of lighting (note to self, use a lower gear next time) I arrive even more sweaty and frazzled (fraggle rock comes to mind), I burst into the supermarket declaring ‘Stop the locksmith!’.

    Finally packed and ready to go (yes, it really was never ending), admittedly an hour later than intended, we went back to the local supermarket to get petrol. By this point we were on a first name basis with most of the staff. Off we trot, relieved and exhausted by the previous 2 hours (and early start — I’m positively NOT a morning person), we realise the absence of the essential tom tom. We would never make it with google maps. We were moving to the middle of bumble funk after all. So back to the flat we go (now 2 hours late). I mean seeeeeeeriously. Then we receive a phone call, ‘Hello, Miss Morrison (which felt weirdly unfamiliar), I’m just calling to let you know that we have just completed’…..CUE WATER WORKS!!!!!! Must get that emotional clumsiness under control before the big day otherwise my tears (albeit happy ones) will be creating a pool beneath me, which may be in keeping with my initial desire to run into the sea after completing our vows (the mortification from my parents stopped this little golden nugget idea) but equally may not be that appropriate.

    So April, long-gone now and a late post this is. Thankyou for being eventful with life-changing moments, challenging debacles, medical diagnosis advancements, demonstrating further deterioration of memory and for taking me one step closer to June.

    Quote for the month….. ‘I am starting to think that maybe memories are like this dessert. I eat it, and it becomes a part of me, whether I remember it later or not.’ Erica Bauermeister




    Manic March

    Well March flew by….how is it the 7th April already?! March was certainly a manic one. April looks set to be more so. Now a house owner, I’ve been organising completion, moving, carpets, utilities…..there really is too much to think about. 

    Shamelessly reaching out for help with various creative ideas and ambitions, researching various opportunities to expand our projects into more long-form opportunities, researching improving our studio set-up and researching how to convert a garage into a studio has all meant that opportunities to compose this past month have been reduced which in turn causes sleepless nights of anxieties of fears of not ‘doing enough’ to succeed (the less enjoyable temperament of being a composer). A number of applications submitted this month for societies, workshops and the like. Which reminds me, I have another application deadline on the 10th. Time to put that together. Locked out of the studio today until my business partner wakes up from his slumber. A performance piece with a dancer was well received. We have been encouraged to develop the piece and apply for funding. Something that will have to wait until after July now.  Work, wedding, house and hen party galore - I’m struggling to find head space for more commitments. 

    Head space is a funny thing. I wonder if women suffer more from it than men. (I say suffer because it seems to be reducing at the moment along with my memory). I feel like due to our skills for organisation, forward-thinking, seemingly instinctual understanding of all things house and life related, there really is a differing distinction of capacity. Currently sat a coffee shop (I’m meant to be giving up coffee), a man next to me is confiding in his friend explaining how the recent headspace he has enjoyed has been a really ‘good thing’ for him. It has allowed him to reflect and develops ideas. Such a coincidence. Apparently the headspace has led him to being more opinionated as well, ‘taking a perspective of what matters and what doesn’t’. I can certainly relate to this. Although I fear such a personality trait lends itself to a perception of arrogance, stubbornness? Maybe it’s the delivery of opinions which can prevent such negative assumptions. Shame I can only hear one of them. I can’t hear a word the other one is saying. Sometimes I really notice how being deaf in one ear can be a hindrance. 

    I’m blessed to have a fiancé who shares responsibilities. Although he lacks the stamina I seem to have, I think my obsessive attitude of having to get everything done without taking breaks is likely slightly unusual (and probably rather annoying to those at the receiving end of it). However, I wouldn’t be where I am today without it. 

    Question, if you have a query about something do you prefer to email or phone? I’m not a fan of talking on the phone. I feel like if you email a bunch of people, those that care will email back. Those that don’t, obviously don’t care enough about getting your service. I’ve spoken to some very friendly carpet fitters and suppliers and studio acoustic consultants and builders recently. The deciding factors for employing them has depended upon their attention to detail in their quotes along with the speed of their responses. 

    Quote for the month… ‘Time decides who you meet in life, your heart decides who you want in life, and your behaviour decides who stays in your life.’ Ziad K. Abdelnour


    February fun

    Well … What a month. As per usual I’m left wondering where it’s gone. My new niece decided she had had enough of her Mum painting doors and consequently popped herself out 12 days early within a labour period of 3 hours (‘had had’ - bad English I presume? I’ll never proclaim to be a writer. At best I’m a note taker). I heard second childbirth is meant to be easier…but seriously….that much easier?!

    We’ve been short listed for a Music and Sound Award for best musical composition in our short film ‘Artificio Conceal’. I never thought much of award ceremonies to be honest. Should I be declaring such flippant beliefs on a blog? It’s like a lottery ticket. You pay for hope which ultimately results in disappointment so essentially you’re paying for yourself to endure a day of misery whilst trying to console yourself that yet again, you have lost …. Or another way to see it, not won. Either way you’re a loser……drama queen?

    So squirrels ….. One chilly, blue-sky, crisp winter morning, I was waiting at Denmark Hill Station and had the pleasure of watching a pair of squirrels. Chasing each other around a tree trunk, I stepped on my train with a grin on my face, highly amused. A few days later I had the pleasure of watching another pair being chased by a dog. The dog evidently found as much amusement from this as the observer. Have you ever noticed how squirrels are always in pairs? I’ve seen so many this month. Is February squirrel month? Even one of my close friends mentioned them in conversation last night over a few cocktails (animal-named cocktails…now there’s a peculiar invention. Pink squirrel - a mix of creme de noyaux, white creme de cacao and light cream apparently. What would a grey squirrel be? Liquorice liquor, white creme de cacao and light cream? ……. I digress). Evidently watching squirrels has become one of my friends past-times which incidentally led to a conversation questioning our age in relation to our new past-time pleasures (Bridget Jones moment alert). Someone recently told me they’d seen a white squirrel too. I officially declare February Squirrel month.

    Inspirational film of the month? Definitely ‘Birdman’. Anyone seen it? Concept of solo drums representing human emotion - not necessarily a concept that hasn’t been thought of before, we all recognise the connection between music and emotion. BUT the development of ideas, the way it was performed, the improvisational sounding elements, and the recording…I mean seriously, I want THAT guy to record my drum parts. It’s topical to a composition I’m working on at the moment (*plug alert). Structured around the story of an epileptic seizure, using dance and music it will explore this journey encouraging the audience to celebrate their emotions and intellect, focussing on interoception, questioning our conscious experience of ourselves and the world around us, what our instinctual being knows and rational minds think. Scientists, psychologists and ‘artists’ all present, it will warrant an interesting discussion.

    Thought of the month. Never undervalue yourself. Think of it in a monetary form. If you provide a quote for a low amount, a client will be reluctant to pay you more for the next job. If you put too a high a quote they can only knock you down a little.

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