Well March flew by….how is it the 7th April already?! March was certainly a manic one. April looks set to be more so. Now a house owner, I’ve been organising completion, moving, carpets, utilities…..there really is too much to think about. 

Shamelessly reaching out for help with various creative ideas and ambitions, researching various opportunities to expand our projects into more long-form opportunities, researching improving our studio set-up and researching how to convert a garage into a studio has all meant that opportunities to compose this past month have been reduced which in turn causes sleepless nights of anxieties of fears of not ‘doing enough’ to succeed (the less enjoyable temperament of being a composer). A number of applications submitted this month for societies, workshops and the like. Which reminds me, I have another application deadline on the 10th. Time to put that together. Locked out of the studio today until my business partner wakes up from his slumber. A performance piece with a dancer was well received. We have been encouraged to develop the piece and apply for funding. Something that will have to wait until after July now.  Work, wedding, house and hen party galore - I’m struggling to find head space for more commitments. 

Head space is a funny thing. I wonder if women suffer more from it than men. (I say suffer because it seems to be reducing at the moment along with my memory). I feel like due to our skills for organisation, forward-thinking, seemingly instinctual understanding of all things house and life related, there really is a differing distinction of capacity. Currently sat a coffee shop (I’m meant to be giving up coffee), a man next to me is confiding in his friend explaining how the recent headspace he has enjoyed has been a really ‘good thing’ for him. It has allowed him to reflect and develops ideas. Such a coincidence. Apparently the headspace has led him to being more opinionated as well, ‘taking a perspective of what matters and what doesn’t’. I can certainly relate to this. Although I fear such a personality trait lends itself to a perception of arrogance, stubbornness? Maybe it’s the delivery of opinions which can prevent such negative assumptions. Shame I can only hear one of them. I can’t hear a word the other one is saying. Sometimes I really notice how being deaf in one ear can be a hindrance. 

I’m blessed to have a fiancé who shares responsibilities. Although he lacks the stamina I seem to have, I think my obsessive attitude of having to get everything done without taking breaks is likely slightly unusual (and probably rather annoying to those at the receiving end of it). However, I wouldn’t be where I am today without it. 

Question, if you have a query about something do you prefer to email or phone? I’m not a fan of talking on the phone. I feel like if you email a bunch of people, those that care will email back. Those that don’t, obviously don’t care enough about getting your service. I’ve spoken to some very friendly carpet fitters and suppliers and studio acoustic consultants and builders recently. The deciding factors for employing them has depended upon their attention to detail in their quotes along with the speed of their responses. 

Quote for the month… ‘Time decides who you meet in life, your heart decides who you want in life, and your behaviour decides who stays in your life.’ Ziad K. Abdelnour