Massive May

Month 5 2016 - woop! I say this every year and probably say it every month but when did it get to May?! This is why the release of my piano album has been a long time coming. The days and weeks and months whizz by without me even noticing and more importantly without me being as productive as I should be. It’s partly due to procrastination fueled by lack of self-confidence….an artists prerogative right? … or an artists curse? I believe the answer lies in reflection and acceptance of self-deprecation. I’m digressing - havn’t done that for a while. Or maybe I just havn’t been acknowledging it much in the hope that those who have read past blog posts are used to it now. Although I fear my blog posts are probably too long and therefore not attractive reading material in a world where a simple yes or no answer is more desirable than an lengthy informative reply. I occasionally have to stop myself being a yes or no person, or one of those annoying people who doesn’t allow the speaker to finish their story because they’ve already guessed what will be said Does anyone else do that? It stems from years of a psychic interactions with my sister. We literally don’t need to finish sentences because we know what the other is going to say. This was most apparent to my Uncle during a game of Articulate a few years ago. He found great amusement in how we would say words to each other which seemingly had no relation to the answer given. We just knew exactly what the other one was thinking. Life is a lot richer when you don’t predict what another person is going to say and embrace the lengthy informative answer.

…..Now I really have digressed. Where was I? Oh yeah, time whizzing by eliciting a feeling of not being productive. That and just simply, I’m so busy outside of work that unless I get everything done during work time it’s quite frankly never going to happen. My business partner seemed genuinely surprised when I deplored I had too many things to do. Deplored is too inaccurate a word. I don’t condemn the things I have to do … announced. He insinuated I just sit there staring into space most days so what can I possibly be busy with. Obviously that insinuation is likely not accurate and in fact is more a representation of the pressures I put on myself for not being productive enough. However, there does appear to be a lack of comprehension on how life outside of work can be busy. Friends and family speak of their packed out weekends so evidently I’m not alone in this. But maybe I should try and book in ‘doing-nothing’ time opposed to booking in ‘I’ve got a spare morning, who can I see within this hour’.  I’m always being told to take time out by family, friends and even doctors but I can’t imagine a life of not seeing friends and family. However, the next weekend I have free is in August and even then the other two weekends in August are already booked. Is that so ridiculous? I just see opportunities of the gift of time. Right now I’m typing this whilst on a flight to my friends hen party. I’ve already done an hour and a half’s work this morning before leaving for the airport at 9:30. Could have had a lie-in I suppose but I needed to finish off some work. I can sleep when I’m dead.

It’s been a crazy busy week which is why this post is late - is that a plausible excuse this time? From researching appropriate mastering studios, CD pressing companies, artist profile pictures, CD artwork artists and venue scouting to a photo shoot, mixing session, mastering session, artwork being created, CD pressing company on standby all within the space of 3 days, I think it’s fair to say I’ve made up for the months of procrastination. I’ve probably mentioned the concept for the album has evolved over time hence being called ‘Evolving Reflections’. It’s quite a daunting affair releasing an album that is practically a biography describing some of your personal experiences. Writing the text for the CD artwork the other day I realised the concept may not be appreciated by everyone and yet it is such an integral part for me. But this is part of sharing your art. You don’t dictate how someone listens to it. Art is to be experienced not solely heard or looked at. It’s to be felt. It should encourage an exploration of the self. I wanted to blog a bit more about the album but I’m now entering the second A4 page which I think makes this blog unacceptable in blog literature rules. So I’m going to sign off for now. I may do a mid-month update this month. But then again pigs may fly.

‘The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt’ - Sylvia Plath

‘Everything you’ve ever wanted is one step outside your comfort zone’ - Robert Allen

‘It’s not who you are that holds you back; it’s who you think you are not.’ - Denis Waitley